Here is an account of what the venerable Sri Ram Sene resolved the other day in their ‘Leadership Team’ Meeting. With this, they hope to win the next general elections scheduled in May this year.
1. Ram Sene has decided that if voted to power it will ban Internet access to all Indians as it pollutes their minds by bringing to their homes alien images and content, which is completely at odds with the Indian culture. The Sene has decided that all Indians will now be able to access only one website, which will showcase Indian Mythology, an assortment of stories and images from the Ramayana, The Mahabharata, the Vedas, the Upnishads and other ancient texts.
2. The Sene has resolved that women and men in India will no longer wear western clothes. All men are to wear kurta and dhoti on all occasions. It would be best for women to stay indoors and not step out. However, if they have to it they must wear sarees with a 2 ft pallu.
3. The Ram Sene has also resolved to ban hospitals following the western system of medicine. They will restore Ayurveda to its lost glory in 3 months by converting all hospitals in the country to its ayurvedic system, which has been in existence for centuries and can cure everything.
4. The western music popular with the youth of the country and the pub culture, which it has engendered will be banned. All Indians must now only listen to the classical ragas at their homes. The Sene will also launch a talent hunt to identify the new age Tansen to take Indian music back to the future.
5. The usage of the English language in any form of communication will be stopped immediately. Sanskrit will the language of choice as it is the mother of all languages. All English and other language books will be dumped in the holy Ganges and India will thus be rid of their polluting presence.
6. The Ram Sene will immediately ban ‘democracy’ and will establish Ram Rajya, with HE Pramod Muthalik, the chief of the Sene as the first avatar of Lord Rama ruling the land. Thus these will be the last general elections in India.
7. It will also reestablish the age old caste system, where in the so called ‘dalits’ will be shown their proper place. The Sene will do away with the contentious reservations policy benefiting the dalits and it will ensure 100% reservations for upper caste folks in all government as well as privately owned institutions
8. Bollywood will be shut down. The real popular Indian entertainment comprising of ‘nautanki’, ‘kathputli’, lok-natak will be available to all in their neighbourhoods.All these famous Bollywood personalities can now be performing in the neighbourhood nautankis.
9. In the arena of sports, India will focus on excelling in wrestling in the mud, kabaddi, gilli- danda and malkhambh. All other sports will be banned.
10. Finally all the Universities will be closed down and Gurukuls will be established throughout the length and the breadth of the country. The students will be provided ancient Indian education and centuries old wisdom as enshrined in the ancient texts.